crismas (tifaheart) wrote in thegoldsaucer,

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I am teh ghey at this XD

Name: Cris
Age: 20
Gender: femaleee
Gender to be rated: any
Height: 5'2"
Hair: dirty blonde
Eyes: blue

(personality questions - NOTE: when you answer these questions, PLEASE provide reasons why you answered the way you did)

"Do you fear death?"

I do indeed fear it.  I remember a time when I used to not, but I think for many reasons I do fear it for the simple fact that even though I complain a lot about who I am..I do love the people I've met in my life everyone I've known, everyone I will know and live the future out with.  To think that anything could end so sudden and take all that away scares me.  Being forgotten for another reason, I'm not a very memorable person but people are forgotten over time, I guess because I don't really seek comfort in the ideas that there is an afterlife..I simply just believe there is death and void.

"Are you overly concerned about being the best or competition with others?"

Not really, I don't think much of myself so there's no way to possibly feel better than anyone else.  I am competitive in some video games, I admit.  But as far as this goes,  the only thing I try to do is learn from others what I do not know and apply it to what I can do or what I can't do.

"Do you often get afraid?"

Depends on what it is but I suppose I am often afraid of my surroundings and what could happen to me.  Not sure why, maybe because I'm paranoid a little but I'm also afraid for my friends/family (omg i'm teh corny but I tell the truth XD) more than anything else.

"Do you depend on others or do you prefer to work solo?"

Errr..hard question.  I do depend on others just to have the comfort of company, people I trust and love...but most of the time I work solo if I'm taking care of important things.  I tend to sort out my emotions on my own but sometimes I think people have a hard time listening or wanting to listen to my bitching so when that happens I try to sort everything out on my own.

"Do you have a large Ego or are you overly Arrogant?"

Neither... -_-; I hate myself, I would feel very arrogant in the slightest if I openly felt good about something I did or who I am..which never really happens anyway XD

"Do you prefer to be directly in the chaos or somewhere on the outside?"

Somewhere on the outside most definately.  Directly in chaos I'm not too fond's okay to an extent but then too much chaos hurts my head and people hurt my head.

"Do you thrive in chaos or would you prefer peace?"

Actually, argh lol such difficult questions (I'm very undecisive XD) I mean, honestly when I'm at peace it's only because I was in chaos to begin with.  I'm able to put whatever 'creativity' I have to use when I'm in chaos.  When something is in a mess I usually put my imagination to use and I'm able to be more at even though it sounds condridctory I can't live without chaos because I couldn't be in peace otherwise.

"How do you feel about love and romance?"

Love and romance are two completely different things, but obviously we can't live without either.  Well...I know I can't live without romance, because I crave it so much even though I've never experienced it. But love happens in life to everyone in some shape, way or form...but to say one thing about myself would be that anything romantic and involving love is my downfall.  I base too much of my life around romantic thoughts, constantly thinking if I'm worth someone's time or someone's effort, which I've clearly decided I am not worth any of these.  I'm not sure exactly why I'm like this, but I feel very comfortable around thoughts of romance because I feel, to me, it is the one thing I could probably live off of my entire life and not go back without a second thought.  Having those feelings in the first place is such a beautiful thing, more so I mean love than anything else.  Romance, can happen through thoughts and wishes, and it can only be fullfilled if there is someone on the other end loving you back.  So they go hand in hand.  But both these things make my imagination go wild, just imagining being held or loved back is enough sometimes to get me through the day even if there's no one holding me back.

"Do you feel sad or guilty at the suffering of others?"

A little of both.  Sad because well if it's someone I know, I will of course feel sad, I believe it's a natural reaction (I and guilty because if I know what happened..perhaps I could have done more..or if they're suffering why shouldn't I suffer the same.

"Does the idea of killing someone strike you at all?"

Ehehehe... yes, but I mainly feel that way because I'm just angry I know there is no humanly possible way for me to go through with it.  I'm too aware of the consequences and the stupidity in doing so..but it's always a thought XD lol I probably scared everyone away now hehe.

"Rate your mood on a scale of 1-10, 1 being thoroughly depressed, and 10 being happy and joyful."

5, right smack in the middle ^^; I am neither depressed or happy, I'm always somewhere in the middle. Most of the time I have mood swings so I'll be a 1 one day and sometimes a 8 or 9 never really 10 the one goal I want from life has not yet been attainted for that to happen.

"Rate your daily energy and activeness on a scale of 1-10, 1 being sluggish and tired, 10 being extremely hyper."

5 yet again XD basically it's the same answer as the previous question.  It depends on the day but I'm never really a 10 because I'm LAZYYYY.

"Do you consider yourself, Calm, Chaotic or Somewhere In Between?"

Somewhere in between.  Which I seem to be for EVERYTHING lol I have my moments, cause I get angered easily.  But I'm usually neither too calm or too chaotic.

"Are you prone to violence?"

Nah.  I get angry very easily but I've never gotten in a fist fight ever, not a REAL one anyway XD

"Do you trust others?"

Yes, sometimes a little too much, I'm DUMB.  It doesn't take long for me to trust someone when I feel comfortable around them or feel they are a good person. I never learn from the shit that's happened...ever.

"Pick One: "In association with others I am.... A. Aloof. B.Very Social C. Avoidant D. Neutral"

Avoidant, THAT DUMB TEST TOLD ME SO!  But I agreed with it, I can be very avoidant, I'm shy, and quiet when I don't know people.  Even when I DO know people I'm shy, because I feel I'm never good enough for anyone.  I do get social, don't get me wrong, it's just a lot of the time I'd rather avoid a social situation with people I feel nervous around and save myself from being embarassed because I do that easily.

"Would you prefer doing something for a righteous cause or for personal gain?"

Righteous cause, because I'm dumb and I have no reason to 'personally gain' anything.

"Are you overly shy, very bold or somewhere in between?"

Uhm...I wouldn't say I'm OVERLY shy, but I am shy, so I don't know, somewhere in betwen I would suppose.  Overly wouldn't be the correct term, just shy most definately.

"Shortly summarize your goals in life:"

To actually gain some talent, to find a manner of speaking, get married..have kids..but yeah I have to gain the love aspect first..thats why XD and to feel confident about myself.

"What is your greatest fear in life?"

To grow old alone/die alone that I won't be loved.

"What is your greatest goal in life?"

well I havent accomplished anything as of now..but I WOULD like to gain some confidence or something, thats definately a goal I would like to achieve someday...

"Would you call yourself a Megalomaniac?"

I don't know what this is, I r dumb but anything with the word maniac I can probably say I'm  not..whatever it is XD

"Do you prefer constant attention?"

Yes and no.  I like attention, but not TOO much of it cause then I blush and get embaressed and start hating myself more than I do already.

"How important are material objects to you?" a degree...I love the things I collect, manga, posters, games, whatever it fact I'd be heartbroken if I ever had to sell them, I love them all.... but in the scheme of things they aren't all that important because I could live without them.

"Chose an Obsession: A. Love , B. Power , C. Wealth , D. Peace/Life E. Chaos/Death "


"Choose a level of mental stability on a scale of 1-10 , 1 being thoroughly insane, 10 being very sane."

maybe 6 or 7 this time..I'm not really insane I'm just very weird and what not.

"Briefly classify yourself, give a stereotype or social "Group" to place yourself in."

Geek! XD I'm a complete and utter geek, I love websites, anime, video games, video game music, fucking own character shrines to FF character XDD I mean yeah, I'm very much up there in the geekdome.

(FF related)

What's your favourite FF game? Why?

FFVII ^^ very closely followed by FFVI..but yes, FFVII ish my favorite..because it's the first game I seriously and passionately got into.  It changed my life, literally in more than one way, to meeting my closest friends in life to all the memories I had on the internet through the dumb tifa/aeris wars (yes they were memories indeed XD) the game is completely amazing.  I was 13 when I played it back in 97/98 I can't exactly say why I fell in love with it in the first place, but I most definately did.  But...I think I'd be here another 5 or so paragraphs saying why I love it in it's entirety.  But to put it simply, it's a legend.

What's your favourite FF character? Why?

Tifa! Gawd, everything about her I love, even her flaws that people so love to judge her for.  She's amazing in every way, the burdens that were rested upon her shoulders, to be able to hold that love within her heart for so very long is amazing.  She's quite possibly, to me anyway, the most realistic character Square has ever created.  Her situations connected to me the very first time I played, I felt so bad for her, through her dialogue you could see she really loved Cloud and at the same time struggled with her own situations.  I don't know what I'd do if I was in her situation, which is why I level with that she did, there's no reason to justify what she did could have been wrong because everyone could have been guilty of the same thing given her circumstance.  When I played her I realized at one point that she was such a simple girl, and she was dragged into this whole massive struggle for the planet, and she stuck with Cloud through thick and thin.  Not only Cloud, but her friends too, they meant so much to her.  Her general love for everyone, caring nature, and of course she was a martial artist..shiiiiiiit how could you go wrong?

Least favourite FF game? Why?

X-2 OMG LIEK YUNA WERAS HOT PANTS *ORGASM* >>;;; I loved X sooooooo much better. And Paine needs to..go away.. -_-;

Least favourite FF character? Why?

PAINE...fjdkajfksajfiajfkldjwaf -___________________________-;

then, post your pictures!!

... will I be killed if I don't? ^^;

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